Monday, November 29, 2010

Nicolas Cage's Acting will Blow Your Mind



Why does it burn!!!!?

Live Blogging Gossip Girl

NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 10: Actor Ed Westwick attends the Saks Fifth Avenue celebration of Fashion's Night Out at Saks Fifth Avenue on September 10, 2010 in New York City. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Saks Fifth Avenue)

- dorota - saucy talk back! blair cannot attack you with a baby strapped to your chest.

- snap to it rufus, those flowers aren't going to move themselves.

- directed by tate donovan...first andrew mccarthy, now tate donovan - why are mediocre 80s suddenly the go-to directors?

- sad manbangs on a stoop ... quack quack to the rescue! nice leather hoodie, quaackers.

- rufus is looking younger by the minute...being a kept man works for you, roof. however, time to get an iphone.

- Like Juliet, I also lounge around the privacy of my home in backless, skin-tight dresses

- "coveat"?

- Note to self: buy a front wrap camel coat

- Nate's mom = emaciated horse.

- Where's Grandfather in all this mess?

- "Vanessa" "bodega" - did Dan just make a racist comment? (Or am I are racist for thinking that's racist?)

- Jenny looks like Skinny Marie (if you don't know, it's a Pretty Woman reference)

- Detective Dan is turning into Psychiatrist Dan. With moobs.

- Rufus get on your goddamned 1993 cellphone and call Lily to let her know the truth about Serena!

- Smart idea Juliet - dress like a skank in a male prison.

- Rufus outdid himself for that feast! I need a kept man, but I don't think I have enough wool sweaters to tempt Ruf

- Best episode ever - getting rid of Jenny AND Vanessa? This IS Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Prince William Proposes Before Going Totally Bald

Britain's Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton (L) pose for a photograph in St. James's Palace, central London in a November 16, 2010 file photo. Britain's Prince William is to marry his fiancee Kate Middleton on Friday, April 29 next year at London's Westminster Abbey, his office said on November 23, 2010. REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett/files  (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS ENTERTAINMENT PROFILE)

I remember when I was 14 being in love with Prince William. Then he started looking a little too Charles-y. I know everyone thinks Harry's the hot one, but I just can't get over the racist mishaps.

So, speaking of proposals, we have put together the all time best movie proposals (that we could find clips of):

(1) Sweet November



Finally, a happy Keanu. This was definitely Oscar worthy.

(2) Pride & Prejudice - BBC Version!



My affections for Mr. Darcy's hat are unchanged. Okay, there is no official proposal on screen, but I imagine him going down on one knee in a wet white shirt declaring her eyes to be "fine" and that she is the handsomest woman of his acquaintance and asking her to marry him.

(3) When Harry Met Sally



Sniff, sniff. I love you too Harry!

(4) Love Actually

Love Actually - Finding Aurelia from Zach Johnson on Vimeo.



Colin Firth wins again. (Sorry for poo poo quality of clip. It's also overdubbed in Spanish)

(5) Sense and Sensibility



Jane Austen you've done it again! Edward, you needed to grow some cohones a long time ago, but I forgive you because you are so adorable. Damn you Willoughby! Damn you!

Killing Hipsters

Personal Ninjas



I'm with Kanye on this one... ninjas are rad, but how do ya go about meeting one?

Monday, November 22, 2010

i love watching people fall

grape lady will always have a special place in my heart but this newbie could take the cake: multiple people falling and face-plants galore! props to gawky teenager number 1 for finishing the race but red sweatshirt number 1 deserves bonus points for best skids forward and running a race in a hoodie...well done.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Best. Video. Ever.

I know that in the 1980s we all weren't as technologically savvy as we are now. But there is no excuse for how terrible this Journey video is. However, terrible translates into awesomeness in this video with air instruments, mullets, keyboards attached to walls, mouth shots, mom jeans, etc.


Journey - Separate Ways
Uploaded by jpdc11. - Explore more music videos.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Jimmy Fallon's Got Talent

Worst Song Ever?



Sorry for possibly ruining your Friday by posting this song. Is that an auto-tuned "Weird" Al Yankovic singing in there?

At least that Heidi Montag garbage came with a video of her nearly naked... ugh, that's still no consolation, ever.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Old Guys Being Gross

Serge Gainsbourg vs. Whitney Houston:


Serge Gainsbourg vs. Whitney Houston
Uploaded by glst81. - Up-to-the minute news videos.

The best part of this video is how the host translates Gainsbourg's English into English.

Joe Namath vs. Suzy Kolber



What a catch!

Lassie's Going to Tear Someone a New Asshole

This is such a tragic story!

Eerste Wereldoorlog, legerhond sergeant Stubby

According to the New York Times, Target, an Afghanistan hero dog was euthanized by mistake at an American shelter. Check out the full story here: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/19/us/19dog.html?_r=1&ref=global-home# (P.S. this photo is not Target, but a dog called Sergeant Stubby).

You know who would never let that happen? Vladimir Putin.

Russia's Prime Minister Vladimir Putin hugs a Bulgarian shepherd dog, after receiving it as a present from Bulgaria's Prime Minister Boiko Borisov (not seen) in Sofia, November 13, 2010. Putin is in Bulgaria on a one day working visit. REUTERS/Oleg Popov (BULGARIA - Tags: POLITICS ANIMALS IMAGES OF THE DAY)

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Worst Prank EVER

Holy crap, this is terrible. But the people involved seem like they have a positive attitude.

According to Gawker, "Rachelle Friedman's bridesmaids pushed her into a pool's shallow end, breaking her neck and leaving her paralyzed from the chest down. Now she can't marry her fiance because their combined income would cause her to lose her Medicaid benefits."

Check out the clip here: http://abcnews.go.com/US/bride-paralyzed-freak-bachelorette-party-accident/story?id=12163284

Yipes. Here's a funnier wedding mishap:

Check Me Out


Sometimes I feel Saved by the Bell should have been more A.C.-centric... seriously.

Hump Day

A little acoustic Digital Underground action to get you to the end of the week:

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Colourblind

So, I'm colourblind. Not full on see the world like an old-timey movie, but certain ranges of blues and greens I can't distinguish. And, when I tell people this, well, this is how it goes down:

Monday, November 15, 2010

Live Blogging Gossip Girl

44395, NEW YORK, NEW YORK - Friday September 3, 2010. Chace Crawford readjusts his shirt as he prepares to shoot a scene for Gossip Girl, with his script in his hand. Photograph: PacificCoastNews.com

- Who is making concentric circles with coloured pencils about Serena, Dan and Nate? It's definitely a man's hands...but why who would consider them all "cute"? Ah. The gay boys. But, "sincere poetry" is used to describe Dan and Serena?? And "athletic lacrosse" is used to describe Nate and Serena??! Someone didn't pay attention in grade four.

-Retraction and apology Serena? Looks like you will have to recall every tabloid ever made (get it? because she's a floozy! ha ha!)

-Do you think Dorota hides behind the door every time Blair is in a room on the off chance she will yell for her?

-Checkmate Lily, finally steppin' up her game.

-Ew, Jenny is the "kind of surprise" I receive when diarrhea accidentally squeezes from my butt. Sorry.

-Has Chuck gotten more breathy than usual?

-Did I direct this episode with my video editing kit I got in 1992? Too many wipe shots (with sounds effects!)

-I really doubt Nate would have enough smarts to want to meet at the Frick

-Serena, you had sex with every man in France, and nearly every man on the show - is it really far-fetched for Lily to think there's another dirty secret?

-As if no one can tell Jenny and Juliette's nasty hair from Serena's.

-Poor cherub Eric.

-Wait, Serena has the dean on text message? Isn't there a registration/admin department at Columbia? Oh right. There is no logic and reason to Gossip Girl.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Theme Song Metal Mayhem!

Who you gonna call?



And where is... the Batman?



Why does it always have to be snakes?



When the evil Shredder attacks, those turtle boys won't cut him no slack:



C'est le dernier dinosaure:



Go Go Gadget:



And finally, YES! \m/(^_^)\m/ YES! \m/(^_^)\m/ YES! \m/(^_^)\m/:

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Family Feud Hilarity!



I feel like someone had naked grandmas on the brain to begin with - he was so quick to answer!

It's the weekend - time to celebrate!



Guess the directors of The Cove didn't see this awesome clip, otherwise they might have rethought the whole 'captivity is bad' thesis.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Conan's BACK!



Last night Conan O'Brian made his triumphant return to television. Despite an awkward bitter part during the monologue and having a non-funny manorexic Seth Rogan as a first host, it was a great show. And here's my favourite Triumph the insult comic dog sketch:


Triumph The Insult Comic Dog - Star Wars
Uploaded by ZaraV. - Watch more comedy videos and sitcoms.

Canada's Jersey Shore



Is "cesspool of humanity" too harsh a term?

Yikes, I don't remember Jersey Shore being this racist. Way to go Toronto, nice advertisement for multiculturalism: the Pole, the Jew, the Albanian...yipes. I'm sure Rob Ford will be watching.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Live Blogging Gossip Girl

Twilight/ gossip girl

-Ladies knock; ergo, Serena is NOT a lady.

-Life is tough; get a helmet. Thanks for the great advice B. But there is no way that GG can make helmets skanky enough for S.

-Ew. What is Juliette wearing? I didn't think they had Limite in the US. She's trying to be Amanda Woodward circa 1993.

-is that a silk shirt, ruf? the ruf, the ruf, the ruf is on fire!

-"go for broke" - that plan never fails.

-let me guess what serena's packing: an assortment of dresses with holes cut out.

-QUACK! QUACK! dan (the duck) the p.i. is on the case

-hmmm, looks like nate might need to enlist the services of dan the p.i.

-passport stamped - new euphemism!

-question: did nate get a perm? or is his hair his way of emoting his sad self?

-QUACK! good and QUACK! salient points, daniel the duck. QUACK!

-eeew. why is arthur a total perv? what kind of creepy eye smirk, was that?

-buffet? buffin?

-does no one go to columbia? how can buffin/buffet and S. have a full-on convo in the halls?

-you are not molly ringwald, juliette do not pull the wrong side of the tracks bullshit. would nate archibald want to date me if he knew i did my own hair? someone thinks she's (all the way) with stephanie kaye (i'm dating myself with degrassi: the old generation references).

-blair is living The Life: macarons, bubble bath...pistachio macacrons!

-ben was a teacher. another piece of side-plot No One Cares About

-it's a dream: head to toe purple velour holding a pistachio macaron. chuck bass i love you.

-sidebar: colin is actually a boy genius...or rather a 34 year old princeton hottie with a major in evolutionary biology and ecology. hot science nerd!

-constantine maroulis! (in the background)

-he resigned? after knowing Serena for a few weeks? what chapter of the book deals with how to be an idiot?

-sad quack. dan's staring for a littttttle too long.

-black collar for realsies, chuck?

-how did vanessa get into the ballet? and when did she turn totally evil? the extensions must be emitting bad thoughts into her brain

-I love how the Dean of Columbia is sorting out GG drama

-SWTF! Wow the gang's pretty harsh on Juliet. Although the crack about her hair was pretty funny.

-Wait? Why are they breaking up? (my guess, her dress). Serena is suchhhhhh a ho. Calling Dan right away?

-Poor Duck! Always lurking in the background!

The Perfect Bid



Wow! A perfect double showcase winning bid on The Price is Right... but wait, why is Drew so blasé about this momentous bid?

Turns out there's much more to this story. Was it cheating or just an amazing chance? Esquire has the story for you here: TV's Crowning Moment of Awesome

And because everyone loves game shows... here's a lady solving a long phrase on Wheel of Fortune, with just one letter (and punctuation):

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Deal of the Day

ITAR-TASS: MOSCOW, RUSSIA. JUNE 6, 2010. At the Melochevka Le Picnic flea market at the Flakon design-factory s grounds. (Photo ITAR-TASS/ Stanislav Krasilnikov) Photo via Newscom

Some crazy grandmother in Florida tried to sell her grandson for $30,000. What's even more shocking is that the purchaser bargained her down from $75,000! That's quite the bargain! I would love to take that person with me to the flea market.

Here's the story from the Toronto Star:

DAYTONA BEACH, FLA.—A Florida woman and her boyfriend have been charged with trying to sell her infant grandson for $30,000.

Florida Department of Law Enforcement agents arrested 45-year-old Patty Bigbee and 42-year-old Lawrence Works on Friday in Daytona Beach after they met with an agent posing as a buyer. Both were charged with illegal sale or surrender of a child, and Bigbee was also charged with communication fraud.

FDLE agent Wayne Ivey said an investigation began last month after an informant told authorities the woman was trying to sell the baby. Authorities say the woman originally wanted $75,000 but was talked down to $30,000.

The child’s mother is currently incarcerated on unrelated charges.

The infant has been turned over to child welfare officials.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Monday, November 1, 2010

Live Blogging Gossip Girl

46902, NEW YORK, NEW YORK - Monday November 1, 2010. Blake Lively and Penn Badgley rehearse their lines for a scene on the set of Gossip Girl amidst rumors of the two ending their relationship. Lively was rumored to be seen spending time with actor Ryan Gosling prior to her breakup with Badgley. Photograph: PacificCoastNews.com

-why is B licking her own envelopes? Where the eff is dorota for these menial, potentially fatal (see: Constanza, George), tasks?

-Deadliest catch, S? That would be your crabs. Ew.

-why are Ruf's pants tighter than Dan's butthole?

-Aw, Eric's all grown up, Danny DeVito-style.

-as if S. knows what a peace treaty is...

-serena and nate are attorneys-at-hair

-Serena, you are so dumb. Why are you talking to obviously-fake-schemer Juliet?

-"Unless you mean Firth or Farrell, I'm not listening": excellent quote B

-dorota is so wise, like a polish yoda

(sidebar: why is taylor swift everywhere? there is no explanation for why CHFI insists on playing her songs all the goddamn time. i'm on team kanye.)

-Dear Random at the Party, thanks for the CEO of Pepsi tip.

-Blair is the voice of reason. She must have learned it from Dorota.

-Speaking of Dorota, she cleans up nice. Her speech, however, was a bit of a snoozer.

-best ever! rachel zoe covered in chocolate...calories are being absorbed through her skin. "I...die."

-whoa slit, serena. what is the point of sheathing yourself in lime green silk if it's going to be a crotch shot anyways.

-wow. rufus. lily's personal coat-check.

-that firey feeling Chuck is not hatred. It's syphilis.

-Um, ew. Why the grainy video? As if B would agree to sleezy hooker sex on her mom's piano

-FYI, here's what you get when you YouTube "Connie Chung piano":

The Rent is Too Damn High - UP Remix



I'd vote for this guy...